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COMPASSionate Parenting is a methodology I created to raise happy, healthy and emotionally independent children. The premise behind COMPASSionate Parenting is that everything we need to know about raising our children can be learned when we study God's relationship with us. By experiencing God's unconditional love, patience, compassion and non-judgemental nature, we learn how to effortlessly guide and nurture our children to a state of wholeness. When we parent our children AND ourselves with passion and compassion, we will ignite our internal Compass to guide us on navigating complex situations, as they arise. We will intuitively know how to handle each situation with grace and ease.
There are certain fundamental principles that need to be our guiding force behind all the daily decisions we make for ourselves and our children. They include honesty, integrity, love, compassion and emotional mastery. Once we develop a solid foundation for these principles, we will then be able to implement flexibility and intuition for those complex grey scenarios, or with children that have special needs. COMPASSionate Parenting is about cultivating deep compassion for your children's mistakes, struggles or addictions. For it is only from that place that we can identify the unmet needs the child is trying to express in the only way they know how. When we judge our children, that inadvertently creates shame in them for not meeting our expectations of them, many of which may be unrealistic for that child. When a child feels shame, they will begin to engage in a multitude of self destructive behaviors, as a direct result of believing they are fundamentally flawed. And if we inflict guilt on them, based on subtle comments or even facial expressions, they will begin to do bad things, because that is what they will believe about themselves.
COMPASSionate Parenting is about parenting with passion, exuberance and excitement, because that energy will be absorbed by our children, who will in turn do their homework, chores and their relationship with us, with the same passion, exuberance and excitement. Of course, the reverse is also true. If we are angry, even though we may feel we have it under control, they will absorb our anger and act it out. The same with judgement, condemnation, sarcasm or impatience. Your children are always going to be an expression of your energy field, whether you are aware of it or not. Moreover, how they see you is how they are going to see God. This means that the most important thing you can do for your children each day is to be aware of and manage your own emotions, and to protect yourself from negative people and environments so you don't bring it home to your kids. Peace, tranquility, harmony, health and joy are all possible for you and your family. I have put together a series of tools to support parents in their journey of parenthood, the most valuable and complex profession on the planet. Sadly, there is no college degree for Domestic Executive and Parenthood, so we need to take proactive steps to learn what works.
I also work directly with children and teens who are struggling with depression, low self esteem, eating disorders or addictions. I have certifications in drug and alcohol addiction counseling, a degree in holistic integrative health and nutrition, as well as several advanced trainings in high level deep dive coaching. I have mastered the art of getting to the root cause of the problem in the very beginning, bypassing the need to focus on symptoms. I then create a custom tailored solution that is unique to the individual needs of each child. I am a sober member of AA where I continue to study foundations for happy living. If there is any way I can be helpful to you or your child, please reach out for a time to talk! I look forward to connecting and supporting you in your parenthood journey!
I am a parent and a child of God, as are you! On a more practical note, I am a mom, a sister and an aunt of 17 nieces and nephews. I am fascinated by the evolutionary process of children, as they morph into adolescence and then adulthood. Childhood undoubtedly shapes the adults our children will grow into.
I began my career as a litigation attorney in New York City. I then worked for a Fortune 500 company where I oversaw more than 300 offices. My experiences led me to discover that my true passion and gifts lie in working with people. I was a health coach for over 10 years. It took me many years to discover my greatest gifts: Creating structures and systems to help families work harmoniously for the good of all.
I was raised in an alcholic and traumatic home environment. I understand first hand the devastating effects that addiction can have on children. I spent most of my adult years re-parenting myself, giving myself everything I had wanted so much from my parents. I developed an in-depth understanding of what kids really need. I created strategies on how to support them in their process of expressing and regulating their emotions, as well as finding their authentic voice.
In my younger years, I ran a Day Camp for several summers, and I am an active participant in the lives of my 17 nieces and nephews. I've been a single mom since my son was 5 with zero financial support from his father or my family. I was Mom, Dad, breadwinner, thrapist and housekeeper, all in the same day. Parenting is unquestionably the most challenging profession known to mankind. It's a thankless job that goes unnoticed. But the fruits of our labor, the health & happiness of our children, are worth everything! Having the correct perspective makes parenting so much less stressful. You don't have to do this alone, as I did. Let's talk!
My Clients are experts at taking care of everyone, but themselves. They perform at the highest levels and take superb care of their families, spouses, pets & jobs. Yet somehow they get left out of the equation. Over the years, this starts to take its toll, impacting their health and inter-personal relationships. It also creates resentment, lack of enthusiasm and lack of creativity. I help my clients learn how to become present to their needs and desires. When we become present, the stress and anger dissipates. We begin to tackle each situation as it arises with clarity and vitality. Presence creates space and time for being with ourselves and those we love most. As stress decreases, performance increases. Life becomes joyful, playful, and meaningful.
There is no way to explain the miracles that have occured for my clients in my deep dive, one-to-one, coaching services. Together, we will go deep to uncover and discover the deepest dimensions of yourself. Powers that have laid dormant in you because you were too afraid to tap into them. You see, parents, coaches & educators are already so powerful and good at what they do, that it becomes enticing to rest on our laurels. Being in a service oriented role is both taxing and lonely. Paradoxically, the deeper into ourselves we venture to explore, the more connected we begin to feel. Not to the outside world, but to the various parts of ourselves. In fact, until we build a loving relationship with every part of ourselves, especially the parts we are most ashamed of, those parts will show up in our children. This prevents us from being the most wholesome and effective parents we can be, and it leaves us constantly stressed and overwhelmed. You deserve so much more, as do your children! While it may sound paradoxical, when you let go of attachment and control, by connecting to infinite intelligence, things miraculously turn out better than you could have imagined.
Do you have the courage to explore what lies deep within you? Don't worry, you don't have to do it alone the way I did. It was hard. I have paved the path for you, so allow me to guide you through the process. It will be as gentle as you need it to be or as intense as you are ready for. I invite you to email me at gail.wisner@compass.com. Let's have a one-to-one intimate conversation about how we can make consistent and incremental shifts in your parenting.